Finding Love and Looking Good
Joann Cohen began her matchmaking boutique to assist upscale professional singles in the Phoenix area in finding a lasting and fulfilling relationship. She gives 100% of her time to her greatest passion – matching attractive, smart and relationship-minded professionals together to form a forever bond.
Her male clients include attorneys, doctors, CEOs, and top executives looking for the right mate to make their private life as successful as their professional one. They come to her because finding love on a busy schedule is difficult. Instead of wasting their time with the wrong date, they invest in Joann to find them a perfect mate.
She delivers the results she promises and has a list of committed and ongoing relationships to her credit, which is why she is endorsed by TLC, USAToday, RedBook Magazine, Phoenix Magazine, ABCNews and many more.
It is also why she is recognized
NATIONALLY as “Phoenix’s top dating coach”
When I sat down with Joann I asked her several questions about her business, Image, and dating in general…
Explain what your service does and why someone should seek you out
I am the only Arizona Matchmaker who works exclusively with men. That means that I can devote 100% of my time and attention to matching men with what they are looking for and have been unable to find.
I don’t rely on intuition alone; I have the power of technology to back up my hunches. I call it “Cutting Edge 21st Century Technology meets Old School Matchmaking”. My male clients are successful in their careers, and they want that success to carry over into their romantic lives.
I only take clients from the Phoenix area and limit my client list to a select few. I believe in focusing my attention on just a few men at a time to ensure that they are getting my full attention and resources.
I am a “Boutique Matchmaker,” which means that I run a personalized and custom service. All the matching I do is performed by me alone. I am not only the face of the organization; I am the organization.
So when you sign on for my services you get those directly from me, I don’t believe in delegating. If I make a promise to you, I personally follow through. It isn’t just me, however, I have a team of experts that aid in the non-matching aspects of my company.
I work behind the scenes with you, Mary Zarob, the Top Phoenix Image Consultant, who meets with clients as needed. I also work with Phoenix’s best photographers, interior decorators, and others to ensure my clients make the best overall impression.
More and more men I meet are leaving online dating and trying to meet women out and about. Why is working with someone like you so helpful?
Before I introduce any match, I meet personally with every single woman to get to know her. Because I only take men on as clients, I have no obligation to find the women who I interview a date.
That means that I am looking for the right match for MY client from all the women who interview. I only introduce women to the men I represent because I believe that they are the right match, not because they are paying me to put them at the front of the line to meet my upscale clients.
I understand how limited time is for the people I represent. That is why they hire me. My goal is not to find as many matches as possible and send them out to “see how it goes”. My mission is to find the one woman who I know is compatible and has all the attributes that my client is looking for.
Being out in the community meeting people is nice, but according to statistics released by the Rosie Project, an initiative dedicated to discovering how long it takes for a man to find love, men will go on as many as eight dates, three blind dates, and meet three mates online before they find “the one”. That is a whole lot of time that many of my successful clients don’t have to weed through and find the love of their life.
Since I know all the information going into each match that many singles don’t have up front, I save my clients time, heartbreak, and money by not entertaining women who simply aren’t meant for them. As an experienced recruiter, I find women that men have a slim chance of meeting by chance, and remove chance from the equation.
Where should a guy take a girl on the first date?
I don’t believe in dating rules or a one-size-fits-all success dating plan. The only dating rule that I have is that both people should have fun. The matches that I find have many of the same interests, so finding the perfect first date that they will both enjoy is easy.
My clients plan an outing that they would enjoy, whether that is dinner and dancing or a quick appetizer. It isn’t as much about “where the date is,” as it is how two people enjoy one another’s company.
I can take a lot of the anxiety out of what to and not to on the first date because I have already unveiled both parties “dating masks”. There aren’t any hidden agendas or secrets. Both parties are there for the same reason, to find a healthy relationship.
With that being said, however, if it is a blind date – using a dating app or online – men have to recognize that a woman’s feeling of safety is going to be her number one priority. So, taking her for a hike in the woods, a romantic isolated picnic, or even back to his house to have dinner is not going to be a good option for the first date.
Even if she agrees to go somewhere secluded, she is going to be tense and uncomfortable. And she probably not enjoy herself the way she would in a public and safe place.
What do you believe are the top dating no-no’s?
I believe one of the biggest dating no-no’s is being disingenuous or untruthful. Trust is at the cornerstone of every relationship. If you are dishonest upfront, and your date finds out, that is a hard thing to recover from. Anything from lying about your position at work to your age might seem insignificant, but it is something that will put little cracks in your date’s trust in what you say going forward.
That is if they even choose to continue. Be honest and be yourself. If the relationship continues, you are going to have to be who you are. So be that right up front and don’t risk losing her losing faith in you.
Being too forward is also a big dating no-no. It is hard to know when to put yourself out there and when to pull back. But people like a challenge to their relationship. If you are overly forward either with your actions or your words, that can be a huge turnoff.
Often, when you push things too fast and too far before you have established a relationship, the other person will find that unattractive and will likely pull away. It is okay to be honest when you like someone, but withhold some of your thoughts. Otherwise, it might come across as desperate.
What should a guy wear on a first date?
When considering what to wear on the first date, the most important criteria is that whatever you choose, make sure it fits well. And that what you wear, of course, is in excellent condition and clean. A man can be wearing a $600 shirt, but if it is too baggy or the arms are too long, it’s just not going to make a good impression. It is much better to wear a shirt that costs $50 and is tailored for a custom fit than to wear one that costs hundreds, and doesn’t fit at all.
The second consideration is how comfortable you are in what you are wearing. If you wear something that is way outside of your normal style, then you aren’t going to be present because it is going to distract you. No matter how good you think it makes you look, if it isn’t within your comfort zone, save it for a time when you aren’t already going to be nervous. An ideal outfit would be one that fits well, is your style, and one that you feel both physically and mentally comfortable wearing.
For your clients who are in a relationship, what do you recommend to keep the romance alive?
Be spontaneous! Never stop surprising the person you are with whether you are together for two weeks or thirty years! Surprises don’t necessarily have to be in the form of a gift. A small gesture such as a spontaneously planned date night to grabbing her around the waist and dancing all alone in the kitchen, are ways to keep the romance alive.
Both men and women have to remember that romance doesn’t end when you say “I do”. Relationships are continual work, not a once and done affair. To keep the relationship from falling out of love, you have to work to keep it fresh and alive.
The book The Five Love Languages, written by Gary Chapman is an excellent resource to figure out what makes your mate tick, romantically. Often, men and women do things for each other because they assume that is what the other wants.
But it isn’t what they really want, which can create resentment for both partners. Once you understand what love language your partner speaks, or what it is that makes them feel valued and loved, it takes a whole lot of mystery out of what you should do to spark a flame. If you don’t understand what signals your partner is looking for to feel loved, then you might be working tirelessly in the wrong ways.
For instance, if your wife is looking for you to spend time with her because she speaks the language of “quality time,” but instead you leave for the day to get her car washed because you speak the language “acts of service,” you are both going to be disappointed.
She is going to be upset you left her for the day, and you are going to be upset that she didn’t appreciate that you washed her car. If you want to keep the romance alive, you have to learn what it is that spells love to your partner, which might be totally different than what spells love to you. Speaking two languages of love, and not even realizing it, creates a huge disconnect.
Anything else you would like to share with those looking for love?
Our culture might romanticize relationships, but they take work. Often, people get more focused on getting into a relationship than they do keeping it. It is after the wedding presents are all put away that the real work begins.
Dating is the easy part, commitment is when you have to step up to the plate, be present, and keep working to make it work out for a lifetime. You not only have to get them to want to marry you; you have to get them to want to stay married to you.
If you are looking to meet your forever match, I am here to help. My job is to help you find the right person to form a lasting bond with. I coach you on what to do to win them over, and, more importantly, to keep them.
The key to finding love is making an action plan to get there, and then taking the necessary steps to follow through. You can contact me via the website at joanncohen.com. Love is out there, you just need to know where to look to find it, and what it takes to be in a successful relationship to keep it.
The Phoenix Matchmaker
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