Being the father of the bride and having a daughter get married can be a little traumatic. After all, some young man is taking your place as the most important male in her life. Some even say that the most emotional man in the room at weddings is not the groom, but the father of the bride. Hey, it’s a big deal, and her wedding is a rite of passage for you, your partner, your daughter, and her fiancé`.
After all, you will be a key member of the bridal party, and you shouldn’t underestimate the role you will play both on the wedding day itself and in the lead up to the wedding. Here are a few father of the bride duties, some of which you will be expecting and some of which you might not.
Traditionally, it was the responsibility of the bride’s father to foot the bill for the whole wedding. Today, it is becoming more common for the couple to pay for the wedding themselves or for both sets of parents and the couple to divide the costs between them. And remember, don’t get carried away in the excitement of the moment when your daughter gets engaged. Early in the planning process, have a serious talk with her about the budget, and what you will be able to comfortably contribute.
This duty is certainly one of the most important, and the reason I’m addressing it up front in this blog. Walking your daughter down the aisle to give her away to the groom is a symbol of your blessing and support for your daughter’s wedding. You are an integral part of the wedding party, and you must look as handsome as your daughter looks beautiful so ask her what she’d like you to wear and dress appropriately.
If the wedding is formal, wear a tuxedo that is the same or compliments what the groom and his father and groom’s men are wearing. If the wedding is a little less formal, and you’re wearing a suit, do the same. Remember, you are basically “on stage” with your daughter, so you need to step up your game. Consider a custom bespoke suit even if you’ve never owned one because this is a time to splurge. You’ll feel more comfortable because it will fit perfectly and was made just for you. In addition, it will be one more way to show your daughter how much you care about making her special day perfect.
Here’s another duty where all eyes will be on you so as mentioned above, it’s important that you look your best and dress the part. The essence of your speech should focus on thanking the guests and those who have helped with the wedding, talking a little bit about your daughter, sharing fond memories, and welcoming your new son-in-law to the family. The speech usually ends with a toast to the newlyweds.
The father-daughter dance is always a tear-jerker at weddings, so it’s best to prepare with your daughter. Choose a song that’s meaningful to both of you or a song that conveys a message to your daughter and her new husband. And, if you don’t dance, consider taking a few lessons before the big day.
There are various other responsibilities that might fall under the father of the bride duties. They include helping with the wedding planning, transportation on the wedding day for the bride and bridal party, and welcoming out-of-town guests and assisting them with whatever they need.
This is a big day in both your daughter's life and yours too. Enjoy the celebration and the beautiful memories you and she will have for a lifetime.